He saw the world at right angles, sharp, geometrically synchronous
She saw the world in feathered edges, soft, undulating, grey where they needed to be
He never sat back in a chair, relaxation meant lack of control, weakness, pain
She let the day wash over her slight frame, cleansing, smelling of honey lilac soap
When carefully mixed, they made a complexity unmatched, people were drawn
Foreground purposeful and solid, background left to fanciful imagination
There were cogs and pulleys, sand and flowers, whips and belts, coalescing
They would hold court and people would come and ask questions and fawn
He held them rapt with numbers, theorem, history as bright and varied as a Pollock
She would roll them about her tongue and make loins tingle, every word a breath of mint
Together they would make the others want to be them, eating from the same trough
When night fell and the others withdrew there were whispers and thoughts of new beginnings
He saw the world at right angles, sharp, geometrically synchronous
She saw the world in feathered edges, soft, undulating, grey where they needed to be
He never took the attention for granted and took the responsibility to heart
She absorbed the energy and returned it tenfold, drunk on the possibilities
That would be me, with my jaw slack and my eyes dazzled as my brain short circuits. Wowww! This is really excellent, Hero, on several levels. I like the point/counterpoint that works as a whole anyway, to great effect.I love the imagery. I love the two characters, they seem like people I would meet or know of. Heaven help any poor fool who bumbles into their orbit, but it works for them, doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteOkay, I am going to slink off back to what I wrote, shamefaced and schooled. Wish I'd have written something this fantastic! :-)
This poem is so crazy-awesome.
ReplyDeleteI especially love this part:
“He held them rapt with numbers, theorem, history as bright and varied as a Pollock
She would roll them about her tongue and make loins tingle, every word a breath of mint“
Every word a breath of mint...refreshing perspective!
ReplyDeleteThis is brilliantly portrayed, Corey!❤️ I love the contrast between; "He saw the world at right angles, sharp, geometrically synchronous," and "She saw the world in feathered edges, soft, undulating, grey where they needed to be." Wow!!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed this poem and the way it explores how differences attract and complement each other: the contrasts in the first stanza, and the lines: ‘When carefully mixed, they made a complexity unmatched’, and ‘She would roll them about her tongue and make loins tingle, every word a breath of mint’. Fabulous!
ReplyDeleteOne of the beauties of life is our differences, so that it becomes an attraction which we can learn from and help us see the world and life through others eyes. What a great read.
ReplyDeleteI love the play of beings here, the way divergent souls collide and forge that complex third self full of whips and cogs and sand and flowers. And poems of true beauty, in this case. Nice echo with the first and last stanzas--very effective.
ReplyDeleteOpposites attract....love the characteristic of both...the merging of creation to be more than either
ReplyDeleteSigh ... a huge sigh of contentment as I read this. Bravo.
ReplyDeleteLove, love, babyluv. Stellar! Love.
ReplyDeleteSuch contrasting perspectives keep things interesting — I like these character sketches with such fine-tuned details that tell a story.
ReplyDeleteI loved these lines in particular: "He held them rapt with numbers, theorem, history as bright and varied as a Pollock/She would roll them about her tongue and make loins tingle, every word a breath of mint".
P.s. I apologize for such a long delay in reading and responding to your take on the prompt.
-HA