Monday, April 30, 2012

The Wordsmiths Song




He laid her to rest in a bath of his brightest verse
Still growing hair propped under a poetic pillow of Christ and despair
Her fingers circled in the finest agony, neatly inscribed in fourteen karat metaphor
Her bosom draped in sonnets that would make Hera blush

You sleep now love
God save me
And eat in filigreed finery
God save me
I'll weep for your ghost
God save me
And companionship lost
God Save me
Take with you these words that I sing
Amen
They are all that I have to give
Christ....amen

He kissed her forehead with senryu lip gloss, cherry
And brushed her hair back with yesterdays melancholy sunset blazing
Her skin was as cold as a Russian winter, inked with an icicle
But her memory was as fresh as a teens infatuated lovers glance

Goodbye dear love
God save me
And fly with lightning bug splendor
God save me
I'll toast your soft touch
God save me
And companionship lost
God save me
Take with you these words that I sing
Amen
They are all that I have to give
Christ....amen

Posted by at 6:37 AM

23 comments:

  1. MarianApril 30, 2012 at 7:17 AM

    senryu lip gloss? i need some of that!

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  2. hedgewitchApril 30, 2012 at 7:55 AM

    This is a real pearl, Corey--very visual, medieval and also timeless, with that haunting rather sinister repetition that is a dark counterpoint to the serenity of the idealized love described, and yet picked out with some rather dark outlines as well. Loved the mix, my friend--and that opening line, then the hair still growing...yeesh!

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  3. Kerry O'ConnorApril 30, 2012 at 9:08 AM

    This poem comes paired with an image of Lady D'Urbanville (Cat Stevens), a sort of In Memoriam to one who was obsessively loved to death. The lines are very passionate, and the refrain haunting.

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  4. Mary B. MansfieldApril 30, 2012 at 10:15 AM

    This is quite the portrait of writer obsessively devoted to his lost love. Especially liked the line "Her bosom draped in sonnets that would make Hera blush" Very nice!

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  5. UnknownApril 30, 2012 at 10:36 AM

    This is great. Love the mix you bring here. Really enjoyed. Thanks

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  6. DaydreamertooApril 30, 2012 at 10:59 AM

    Awwww.. how sad. Your writing is truly exquisite.

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  7. MargaretApril 30, 2012 at 1:33 PM

    Amen, indeed. "under a poetic pillow of Christ and despair".... truly an amazing line!

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  8. LauraApril 30, 2012 at 2:00 PM

    beautifully dripping with sorrow.

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  9. MaryApril 30, 2012 at 2:49 PM

    Corey, Amen indeed. Your words "God Save Me" resonate. We all wish this, I think. And often it is only words that we have to give in return. Stunning poem.

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  10. AnonymousApril 30, 2012 at 3:41 PM

    "He laid her to rest in a bath of his brightest verse" ... Well if they are hot and bubbly, this sounds like a lovely soak.

    "senryu lip gloss, cherry" ... Flavored lip gloss and poetry?! my goodness, that sounds like a nice combo.

    "brushed her hair back with yesterdays melancholy" ... Gorgeous. I love having my hair brushed. And it's always full of melancholy, so this is fitting.

    What a creative poem.

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  11. AnonymousApril 30, 2012 at 3:42 PM

    P.S. I do get that she's dead, but I'm ignoring that and enjoying the sensuality instead. ;)

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  12. W.k. kortasApril 30, 2012 at 4:34 PM

    Puts in mind of the old Cat Stevens (well, it's the Cat--I guess they're all old now) song "Lady D'Arbanville", has the same feel of unwilliing to let go almost to the point of outright denial. It's clever, but not to the point of distracting or detracting from the piece. Finely built piece of writing.

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  13. Susie ClevengerApril 30, 2012 at 5:02 PM

    Simply Wow!

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  14. ScarletApril 30, 2012 at 5:15 PM

    The opening lines are just exquisite verses...love the refraining lines ~

    Love work Corey ~

    I also have to say that one day I will write a poem based on that music, You Smell Like Mexico ~ :-0

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  15. Ostensible TruthApril 30, 2012 at 5:59 PM

    now I do like a "fourteen karat metaphor" and "senryu lip gloss, cherry... with yesterday's melancholy sunset blazing"

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  16. AnonymousApril 30, 2012 at 7:29 PM

    Such a lovely poem. Beautiful imagery, a sense of foreboding and longing both come with the refrain. K.

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  17. kaykualaApril 30, 2012 at 7:42 PM

    A silent prayer for a love lost! Very moving and a lovely take, Corey!

    Hank

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  18. Sherry Blue SkyApril 30, 2012 at 9:07 PM

    I love the format with the alternating refrains........the reader gets pulled into the maelstrom of emotion. Wonderful write, kiddo!

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  19. Kay L. DaviesMay 1, 2012 at 2:12 PM

    Very well done, Corey, emotional and well-painted.
    K

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  20. De JacksonMay 1, 2012 at 7:35 PM

    Especially love "fourteen karat metaphor."
    Excellent stuff.
    De Jackson
    whimsygizmo.wordpress.com

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  21. Isadora GruyeMay 1, 2012 at 9:50 PM

    He laid her to rest in a bath of his brightest verse
    You know when a poem starts out with a line that good, that compelling, and that passionate, the poem is either going to go down hill from there or soar.. This soars spectacularly. Though I am not familiar with the Cat Stevens song which Kerry and Kortas speak of, there is a hint of Poe among these lines. Viva la

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  22. rallentandaMay 1, 2012 at 11:37 PM

    I like bosoms draped in sonnets that would make Hera blush...How Greek and chic:)
    Weird but wonderful!

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  23. PattiKenMay 2, 2012 at 3:57 PM

    What I enjoy most about this poem is the way the sorrow seeps in and spreads as I read. There are many lines that blow my socks off, but even setting aside the actual words, the feeling permeates. It's like listening to a really melancholy dirge. Well done.

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